Update

It is now four o’clock in the morning. The carpet guy, who has an Australian accent and swears like the devil with a hot poker in his foot, just left. He ripped up all the carpet, vacuumed up the rather astonishing quantity of water beneath it, and departed. The place is well and truly trashed, though surprisingly the only things that were destroyed (other than the carpet) were a 25-pound box of kitty litter and a twelve-pack of toilet paper. I have gone from a plethora of toilet paper to a paucity of toilet paper in a snap of the fingers.

Twenty-five pounds of kitty litter is more kitty litter than you think. Especially when it’s burst out of a soggy cardboard box onto the kitchen floor, where it’s then absorbed approximately sixteen metric tons (or two-thirds of a metric fuckton) of water.

I passed “utterly exhausted” about two hours ago and I am now in the Land of Delirium beyond, where pixies cavort in unsavory ways with the shade of Henry Kissinger.

The cat is no longer amused.

34 thoughts on “Update

  1. Plethora of paper to paucity of same! You haven’t gotten water damage to your alliterative vocabulary.

    Sorry to hear about your misfortune, though, seriously.

  2. Plethora of paper to paucity of same! You haven’t gotten water damage to your alliterative vocabulary.

    Sorry to hear about your misfortune, though, seriously.

  3. Imagine how much worse the water damage would have been if the TP and kitty litter hadn’t soaked up so much of the water!

    Glad to hear nothing important like….Oh Russian ad-bot hunting computer equipment got damaged.

    so do you get new carpet now? new water heater? even more contractor fun and goodness!

  4. Imagine how much worse the water damage would have been if the TP and kitty litter hadn’t soaked up so much of the water!

    Glad to hear nothing important like….Oh Russian ad-bot hunting computer equipment got damaged.

    so do you get new carpet now? new water heater? even more contractor fun and goodness!

  5. Twenty-five pounds of kitty litter is more kitty litter than you think. Especially when it’s burst out of a soggy cardboard box onto the kitchen floor, where it’s then absorbed approximately sixteen metric tons (or two-thirds of a metric fuckton) of water.

    Think of it this way; maybe that 25 pounds of kitty litter soaking up sixteen metric tons of water saved you from worse damage to other things in the house?

    And, now you get to buy new carpets, in a color you like better!

    See? Silver lining. πŸ™‚

    I know; shutting up now.

  6. Twenty-five pounds of kitty litter is more kitty litter than you think. Especially when it’s burst out of a soggy cardboard box onto the kitchen floor, where it’s then absorbed approximately sixteen metric tons (or two-thirds of a metric fuckton) of water.

    Think of it this way; maybe that 25 pounds of kitty litter soaking up sixteen metric tons of water saved you from worse damage to other things in the house?

    And, now you get to buy new carpets, in a color you like better!

    See? Silver lining. πŸ™‚

    I know; shutting up now.

  7. That is a most unpleasant surprise to come home to. *petpet* At least the carpet guy was willing to come out at o’dark thirty in the morning so you didn’t have to deal with moldy carpet. That’s even less fun, let me tell you.
    You might want to keep your kitty litter and toilet paper off of the floor. Just saying. Although it did soak up huge amounts of water.

  8. That is a most unpleasant surprise to come home to. *petpet* At least the carpet guy was willing to come out at o’dark thirty in the morning so you didn’t have to deal with moldy carpet. That’s even less fun, let me tell you.
    You might want to keep your kitty litter and toilet paper off of the floor. Just saying. Although it did soak up huge amounts of water.

  9. Dear Diary,
    I finally got the delivery confirmation on the water elemental I’d ordered that was supposed to send to a watery grave. Sure enough, the damn thing was dead when it arrived.

    Note to self: Next time, pay the extra 10 bucks for shipping insurance and use a carrier with experience in shipping extra-dimensional entities.

    *back to the drawing board*

    (In all seriousness, that sucks and you have my sympathies.)

  10. Dear Diary,
    I finally got the delivery confirmation on the water elemental I’d ordered that was supposed to send to a watery grave. Sure enough, the damn thing was dead when it arrived.

    Note to self: Next time, pay the extra 10 bucks for shipping insurance and use a carrier with experience in shipping extra-dimensional entities.

    *back to the drawing board*

    (In all seriousness, that sucks and you have my sympathies.)

  11. suckage

    clearly it was the weekend for it…I had about seventeen gallons unleashed on the pergo this last week…didn’t work it out until yesterday. finally got people in to deal with it today. I really love having insurance.

  12. suckage

    clearly it was the weekend for it…I had about seventeen gallons unleashed on the pergo this last week…didn’t work it out until yesterday. finally got people in to deal with it today. I really love having insurance.

    • Fortunately (for me, anyway), the big industrial vacuum they used to slurp up all the water also made short work of the soggy kitty litter. Good thing, too, else I would likely have needed a chisel to chip it all away when it dried.

  13. Fortunately (for me, anyway), the big industrial vacuum they used to slurp up all the water also made short work of the soggy kitty litter. Good thing, too, else I would likely have needed a chisel to chip it all away when it dried.

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