Eating a bowl of Cap’n Crunch cereal for lunch this afternoon (okay, I admit it, I have the dietary habits of a six-year-old), and what do I see on the box but the new Cap’n Crunch advertising slogan:
“Crunch-a-tize me Cap’n!”
I shit you not. My God, what I would have given to be a fly on the wall at the meeting where the marketing geniuses came up with that one.
I particularly like the “TM” on the slogan. Yes, boys and girls, they trademarked this slogan.
Ye Gods.
Just finished a major revision to my Web site, and created a whole new wing.
Billboards.
Yep, billboards. They’re more than just visual clutter; they’re also social commentary.
And sometimes unintentionally funny social commentary, at that. Who knew that the secret to group sex with hot bi babes was drinking Captain Morgan’s Spiced Rum?
Someone asked the question on a technical forum recently, “If you could go back in time and change the events in your life, would you?”
It’s a good question. My answer:
This is a question I’ve wrestled with quite often.If I could go back and change some of the things in my past, I could no doubt spare myself–and others–a great deal of pain and regret.
However, I’m not completely convinced that it would be worthwhile to do so.
Aside from the philosophical issue that having a life free from pain is not necessarily a desireable goal, there’s the simple matter that the person I am right now is the result of the accumulation of experiences, good and bad, that have shaped and developed me and the way I see the world–and I like the person I am right now.
The parts of my life which have been the most painful–failed relationships, poor decisions–have also been the parts of my life where I have learned the strongest lessons about how to live my life the way I want to live it and how to seek happiness for myself and those i love without doing so at the expense of others. I would not choose to erase those lessons–not for any reason whatsoever, certainly not just to spare myself some pain.
Pain is a part of life. If you never hurt, you never feel. To wish for a life free from pain is to wish not to be alive at all.
The biggest regrets I have are not about times where I’ve been hurt, but rather about times where I have hurt other people. If I could change the things I have done which have hurt others without losing the value I have gained from those experiences, i might choose to do so, but I doubt it–who am I to judge the lessons those people have learned from those experiences? And is it any more realistic to desire a life where you never cause pain for anyone else, directly or indirectly, than it is to wish for a life free from pain yourself?
Many years ago, I dreamed of building a couple of small jet engines and mounting them on my Volkswagen Bug.
Apparently, it’s not as difficult as I thought. Ever wanted to build a jet engine or a cruise missile in your garage? Your prayers are answered.
Saturday: Meeting, greeting, doing things Bad and Wrong
Saturday night’s play party was a smashing success. Kelly and I accompanied our friend J and her boyfriend; about eighty people there altogether. Kelly and I got things rolling early with a nice long session with the violet wand and the axe. Always good for a show; the axe never fails to get a lot of attention, especially in a darkened room with a shower of sparks cascading off the edge.It was the first time Kelly’s ever played in public; all in all, I’d say it was quite successful.
J did some playing too; she got to feel the wand, attached to a Wartenberg wheel, for the first time.
She said it tickled. That woman is crazy.
Later, a very attractive pair of women approached me and asked if they could see what the wand felt like. Sure, I said, hold out your arm.
“No, not on my arm. I want to feel it on my breasts.”
I like evenings like that. 🙂
May be setting up a photo shoot with one of the two at some time in the near future.
Sunday: Back at the flight field
Much too early, I might add. We didn’t get home ’til quite late, and damn, the people like to be at the field early.Engine problems notwithstanding, I got the plane in the air for quite a while this morning:
Came home, went to bed, and slept like the dead all day long.
A beautiful day in the NAY-bor-hoooood…
A good morning
Awakened by Shelly this morning; we’re working on an arrangement that will offer her the feeling of security she needs to feel safe in our relationship–without crossing Kelly’s boundaries. Sometimes, optimism pays. I have a very, very good feeling that we can find a way to make everyone happy.A good afternoon
Spent a lot of time at the field today. Flew the plane several times; the engine still has a couple of minor problems idling reliably, but we’re making progress. I’m getting the hang of flying, too! 🙂 I want to get a new digital camera and mount it beneath the plane so I can start taking some aerial shots. Now THAT would be cool.A good evening
Going out to an S&M play party this evening. Bringing THE AXE and the violet wand, and I’m going to be very evil to kellyv. Heh, heh, heh.I almost missed it…
…but I’m the guest photographer this month on the Eye Candy Web site. 🙂
I’m SUCH a sheep.
Going postal
I spend a good deal of time answering technical questions and troubleshooting computer problems for my clients, most of whom are in the advertising and graphic art community.
Lately, I’ve been dealing with a number of people who are attempting to perform complex tasks–for example, use $5,000 page imposition software–without having even the most basic of computer skills. I charge far too much money to be spending time with my clients trying to teach them to use the mouse.
It’s frustrating. To give you an idea of HOW frustrating, if I were a postal worker rather than a computer tech, my day would probably look something like this:
Hello. Can I help you? You’d like to mail that letter to your brother? Okay, not a problem. Let me see the letter…Ah, your brother’s name is Jeb. Okay, there’s a problem–you don’t have an address on this letter.
An address. Yes, sir, we need an address. You know, where your brother lives.
No, sir, don’t describe his house to me! That won’t really help very much. We need to know where the house is.
Yes, sir. Where it is. You know, like what city it’s in. What’s that, sir? City. What city it’s in. City…it’s like a town, only bigger.
Ah, he lives in the country! I’m not surprised. What’s that, sir? Yes, I do live in the city myself. Yes, I suppose that does make me a city slicker.
But we still need to know where your brother Jeb lives. Tell you what. Let’s start with what state he’s in.
State. You know, what state he lives in. Um, you know, the country is divided into states, see, and…
Yes, sir. Country. Like, the United States of America. Yes, that’s it! America. America is divided into states, and…yes, that’s it, sir. Yes, you are a “Murican.” Yes, I’m sure your brother is a “Murican,” too.
Now, then. We need to narrow down what state your brother lives in, and…what’s that, sir? Ah, I see, you have an American flag on your pen, how nice. I’m sorry? You have an American flag on your truck, too? I’m not surprised. I bet you have a gun rack in it as well, don’t you?
Ah, you do have a gun rack in your truck? Well, fancy that. But we still haven’t–where are you going? No, sir, I don’t need to see your gun. And you can’t bring a gun into a post office anyway.
Beg your pardon? Charlton Heston? No, sir, I don’t know what Charlton Heston would say about that. But I’m sure he and I would both agree that you really, really don’t want to give me a gun right now.
Focus, please. The letter, remember?
We need to find out what state your brother lives in. State, like Texas, or…Texas. Yes, Texas. It’s a state. Your brother lives in Texas? Good! We’re making progress. Now we need…what’s that? How did I know? Lucky guess.
Okay, I’ll tell you what, sir. It’s time for me to leave, but my friend Bob is just coming on duty, so….Hey, Bob! You want to help this gentleman send this letter?
Problem is, I own the company, so there is no Bob for me to give these clients to…
On the nature of happiness
I had a dream last night that I was arguing on the telephone with ectropy.
Why her? I have no idea. I don’t know her, and don’t have any association with her other than LiveJournal. But there it is.
In any event, we were arguing about the nature of happiness. She was trying to get a gumball out of a gumball machine, and there was one purple gumball in the machine–all the way at the top. Her argument was that she wouldn’t be happy unless she got the purple gumball, but since it would clearly require her to buy all the gumballs in the machine, it wasn’t worth pursuing.
I argued that the happiness isn’t in the gumball, it’s in yourself, and that the secret is to be happy no matter what gumball you get.
I have no idea what any of this means. Dreams are stupid, anyway. 🙂
