My wife bought me a pair of black leather gloves today, totally out of the blue. I put them on and said they make me look like a villain out of a James Bond movie. Yeah, she replied, that’s why I got them for you.

My snake has decided that she’s unhappy with her current living arrangements; she’s escaped from her cage twice in the last three days.

And she’s getting a fercious appetite. She ate yesterday, then immediately started looking for another rat. So now I have to get her another one, and a new cage, this evening.

My wife is insisting we see the “Harry Potter” movie this evening. I’d rather see “Mulholland Drive,” in part because David Lynch is usally a pretty safe bet (“Dune” aside) and in part because it has a lot of hot lesbian sex. Somehow, I am skeptical about the amount of hot lesbian sex I’ll see in “Harry Potter.”