Another Content-Free Post

Specifically, a meme that’s a long list of questions, this time spruced up with many pictures and illustrations.


1.ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?

I have a scar on my left wrist, surrounded by two rows of little white dots. I got it in about 1978. Star Wars was still all the rage, I was heavily into model rocketry, and Estes, a hobbyist rocketry company, had come out with a rocket shaped like R2D2. I was working on it with an XActo knife, and foolishly cutting toward myself. The knife slipped, and…

I was home alone, and had to go to the neighbor’s house to get a ride to the emergency room to get stitched up.

2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM?

I have nothing up on the walls in my bedroom. The walls in the living room have several posters: a large picture of a woman wearing a strapon, a poster of the running woman from the Apple “1984” ad, a movie poster from the movie version of Dune, a print of a Japanese woman, a poster of the Chandra X-Ray Observatory satellite, and several black and white photographs of my own.

3. WHAT DOES YOUR CELL PHONE LOOK LIKE?

I just got an iPhone! It’s gorgeous. 🙂 I haven’t customized the background yet.

4. WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO?

For the most part, synthpop, industrial, and EBM. Occasionally, a smattering of other stuff–alternative, neo-folk, and old-school metal. My playlist these days has featured bands like Mesh, VNV Nation, A Perfect Circle, Neurotic Fish, Rotersand, Necessary Response, Covenant, and Front 242 rather prominently. A great deal of my recent musical taste has been influenced by dayo.

5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?

Um…no.

6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?

Right now? More than anything? That’s easy. Money.

It’s not that money is important in and of itself; it’s that money can get me all the things I most want right now. A travel budget, for example, would let me spend more time with my sweeties, which is what I really want most. It would also give me the leisure time to be able to travel.

Oh, there is something else I want. Immortality. I want that, too.

7. WHO DO YOU MISS?

Jesus, where to start? Shelly, dayo, figmentj, Gina, zaiah, joreth… If I could, I’d visit every one of them, starting right now.

Also, datan0de, because it’s been quiet lately. Too quiet. I haven’t lost a clone or a probe in weeks, the aerosol and biohazard sensors haven’t gone off in over a month, no perimeter wires tripped, and the concentration of free-floating nanobots in the air around my apartment is down 24%. It’s weird.

8. WHAT’S YOUR MIDDLE NAME?

William.

9. THE BEST TV SHOW EVER CREATED?

The “best” TV show? Well whatever it is, I’m sure it’s not “Friends.”

I don’t watch a lot of TV. When I was camping recently, we watched some episodes of the new Dr. Who that were quite brilliant. Battlestar Galactica is sometimes quite brilliant as well.

10. THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO?

dayo, if texting counts as “talking.” A coworker, if it doesn’t.

11. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK?

Depends. What’s in the dark?

12. THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY?

Well, hmm. That’d probably be zaiah. It’s a good thing, though. We were exploring some really, really dark sexual stuff.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOGNE / PERFUME?

Dear God. Almost all such things smell like an accident at a chemical plant to me.

Maybe that should be a new line of cologne. Industrial: For When You Want To Smell Like a Petrochemical Plant.

I do like vanilla, though.

14. WHAT KIND OF HAIR/EYE COLOR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?

I don’t tend to look for things like that in the opposite sex.

15. WOULD YOU RATHER BE SMART OR FUNNY?

Mhr? Being smart definitely helps one to be funny, if you’re talking about the “laughing with” kind of funny rather than the “laughing at” kind of funny.

16. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINKS?

Coffee is revolting.
Energy drinks are less revolting.
Energy drinks with vodka–now we’re on to something!

17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?

I’m a traditionalist. Pepperoni is fine for me.

18. IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?

YOUR SOUL.

19. WHO IS THE LAST PERSON YOU MADE MAD?

I’m not really sure. I think figmentj was mad at me a while ago.

Well, “mad at me” is a little strong. And things are better now for it.

20. DO YOU SPEAK ANOTHER LANGUAGE?

Nope. A few words of German and a little bit of French, but not enough to communicate.

21. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU?

I have no idea. Wasn’t even born yet, if you want to get technical about it. Probably booties or a bib or something.

Now Baby’s First Sawblade Shooter would have been an awesome first gift.

22. DO YOU LIKE SOMEONE?

I like many people.

23. ARE YOU DOUBLE JOINTED?

No, but I can dislocate my right thumb whenever I want to. Got my hand slammed in a car door as a child, and now I can just pop my thumb right out of where it’s supposed to be.

24. FAVORITE CLOTHING BRAND?

Um…? They make brands of clothing?

25. WHAT’S YOUR DREAM CAR?

Easy. Lotus Elise. This car is gorgeous, nimble, and fast. Cheap, too, as exotics go.

26. WHAT COLOR IS IT?

The dream car? I’ll take it in slate gray, kthx.

27. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE KIND OF EXERCISE?

Beating people up in Alterac Valley.

What do you mean, that doesn’t count?

28. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING?

Apparently, I would, considering that all of my relationships are long distance.

29. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?

Evidence would suggest the answer to that question varies from person to person. This is especially tricky when you consider that oftentimes, folks won’t tell you what the best way to tell them they mean something to you happens to be.

30. SAY A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED:

Okay, I’ve said it. (The directions didn’t say to write it!)

31. BLONDES OR BRUNETTES?

Both?

32. WHAT IS THE ONE NUMBER YOU CALL OFTEN?

Probably dayo‘s number. I don’t actually make many calls at all. I tend to be a read-only kinda person that way.

33. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?

Credulity.

Whether it takes the form of “We never went to the moon,” or “Vaccination causes autism,” or “Chlorinated water causes birth defects,” credulity (and the rampant anti-intellectualism on which it feeds, and which in turn feeds it) is without question the biggest single problems we human beings have.

Many other social ills, from racism (the notion that one race or ethnic group of people is inherently superior to another) to misogyny (the notion that women are inherently inferior to men) to ridiculous and expensive wars in the Middle East, are merely specific instances of credulity.

34. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE U.S.?

Been to Canada and Mexico, Canada when I was very young and Mexico when I was still in high school.

35. YOUR WEAKNESSES?

Bullets, flamethrowers, wooden stakes (with sufficient kinetic energy), nanoscopic disassemblers, and jelly donuts.

Mmm, jelly donuts.

36. TATER TOTS OR FRIES?

Tater tots, plz. Though really, why even get this specific?

37. FIRST JOB?

Telemarketing. Boy, did that suck. I worked as a telemarketer selling magazine subscriptions for about four days. Whew! Those people suck.

38. EVER PRANK CALLED SOMEONE?

Nope.

39. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED OUT THIS?

Helping David put the SIM card back in his new iPhone. He accidentally popped it out.

40. IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE?

I don’t want plastic surgery. Can I pass?

41. WHY DID YOU FILL OUT THIS SURVEY?

It’s easier than doing a real post. I can work on it while doing other stuff. Content-free is king!

42. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST?

My writing. Apparently, when I said “content-free is king” just now, I lied.

43. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ALCOHOL BECAME ILLEGAL?

Write a long, scathing LiveJournal rant on the stupidity and credulity of a society willing to make the same mistake again, no doubt.

44. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?

Money.

And a Lotus Elise.

45. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?

Zero!

46. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?

Not to my knowledge. Though people in middle school called me “Benjamin Franklin” a lot. Ha, ha, guys. Very clever. No, really, very clever. See this? This is my “awed at your cleverness” face. Nobody else ever thought of that one!

47. DO YOU WISH ON STARS?

No. Nor do I pray to imaginary friends.

48. WHICH FINGER[S] IS YOUR FAVORITE?

Depends on what I’m doing with them at the moment, I suppose. Often, it’s the ones in the rubber gloves.

49. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?

When zaiah was down. She was busy doing some very evil things to me at the time. I won’t disturb you witht he details, because they would…disturb you.

50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?

I remember handwriting…

51. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?

Objection, Your Honor. Assumes facts not in evidence; namely, that there’s a lunch meat I like.

52. ANY BAD HABITS?

Too many to enumerate, at least in a reasonable amount of time. Not calling people often enough is one of them.

53. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF?

54. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?

Oh, yeah. I dig me.

55. HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL?

Not to my recollection.

56. DO LOOKS MATTER?

Um…

57. HOW DO YOU RELEASE YOUR ANGER?

I rarely, and I do mean rarely, get angry.

58. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME?

Orgrimmar.

59. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?

I do, as a matter of fact. That’s a feature, not a bug.

60. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD?

As a child? Who cares about that? Far more interesting is my favorite toy as an adult!

61. HOW MANY NUMBERS ARE IN YOUR CELL PHONE?

64.

I was tempted to be a smartass and answer “ten, numbered “0” through “9.” Aren’t you glad I resisted?

62. DO YOU USE SARCASM?

The answer to that question is intuitively obvious to the most casual of observers, and will be left as an exercise for the reader.

63. DO YOU KNOW ANYONE FAMOUS?

I do! At least Internet famous. And she writes awesome books. (Hi, sweetie!)

64. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT?

Oh, yes. In fact, I’ve gone down in a pit, at a Nine Inch Nails concert (and came home covered in bruises), and once got thrown off a dance floor at a goth club for moshing.

65. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?

I look for someone who’s smart, I look for someone who’s fearless, I look for someone who has something to teach me. Every woman who’s part of my life has some skill I don’t, or something I can learn from, or something that challenges me in some way.

66. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?

Tacit is the most common. For a long time, back in the old BBS days before these newfangled tubes came along, I was widely known as “turtle;” in fact, there’s still a handful of people who call me “turtle.”

67. HOW MANY PAIRS OF SHOES DO YOU HAVE?

I thought for the longest time I owned only one pair. When I moved last month, I discovered a second pair hidden in the dark recesses of my closet that I knew nothing about.

At least I assume they’re mine. They seem to fit me reasonably well, anyway. They’re of a style I’m unlikely ever to wear, but I can’t imagine what they’d be doing in my closet if they aren’t mine.

68. DO YOU UN-TIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?

I have to.

I currently wear a pair of black high-tops, which I hate with a stabbity stabbity burning hate. Wanna know why I hate them? Because I have to untie them to take them off.

Hate, hate, hate.

69. WHERE YOU UPSET ABOUT STEVE IRWIN DYING?

Upset? No. He’s outside my monkeysphere. I liked his show, so I was disappointed about it.

70. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR?

Okay, this is going to shock and upset many people, but…

I don’t like ice cream.

It’s true! I’m not a fan of ice cream. Never have been, really.

71. ARE YOU LAZY?

I am to “lazy” what the Kennedy assassination is to conspiracy theories. I am a deeply and profoundly lazy human fucking being.

I also feel guilty when I’m not accomplishing things.

Yes, I’m conflicted.

72. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE COLORS?

Black as Midnight, black as pitch, blacker than the foulest witch.

Oh, and purple.

73. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BAND?

74. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE?

Zero. They’ve all been removed. It was quite an ordeal, too.

75. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?

Everyone? Like, the world’s six and a half billion people? Look, I’ll be blunt. There are so many people in the world that I don’t even care if some of them die. Neither do you, if you’re honest about it.

76. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?

A coworker discussing shipping of a unit to a customer. Yes, I’m doing this at the office. Yes, that makes me a bad person.

77. LAST THING YOU ATE?

YOUR SOUL.

No, no, wait, that’s not true. The last thing I ate was a chicken melt at Steak & Shake.

The waitress there was unhappy with David and I because we didn’t ask to be seated in her area like we promised to. Whenever we go there, she hits on us (aggressively; Im not talking about flirting). She once told me that she wanted to have a girlfriend, but only if her husband wasn’t allowed to have sex with her girlfriend. Last time we were there, she told me that she and her husband had separated. And told me about her new piercings. And poked me.

78. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?

zaiah

79. WHATS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?

Nice, big…brains.

80. FAVORITE THOUGHT PROVOKING SONG?

VNV Nation, Epicentre. I have written a lengthy post inspired by that song and a Twix bar from a vending machine.

81. FAVORITE THING TO HATE:

Superstition.

82. FAVORITE DRINK?

It’s called a Grape Crush. I was introduced to it by a lovely bartender named Jody in a place I used to shoot pool. I have no earthly idea what’s in it, but it’s very complicated, has many ingredients, and will well and truly mess you up.

83. FAVORITE ZODIAC SIGN?

Objection, Your Honor. Assumes facts not in evidence.
In fact, all of astrology assumes facts not in evidence.

84. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SPORT?

Again with the unwarranted assumptions!

85. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR?

Kinda sorta brownish.

86. EYE COLOR?

Hazel. Least that’s what my driver’s license says.

87. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES?

I do! I need new ones, though.

88. SIBLINGS?

A sister. I haven’t spoken to her in years. Last I heard, she was bucking for partner in a law firm in Denver.

89. FAVORITE MONTH(s)

That’s easy: August and October. August because of DragonCon; October because of Necronomicon. They’re science-fiction conventions, which sort of act as bookends on the best part of the year.

90. DO YOU LIKE SUSHI?

Yes! That’s a recent development.

91. LAST THING YOU WATCHED?

The new Batman flick. ‘Nuf said.

92. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?

March 23, the anniversary of my birth. If anyone’s interested, a Lotus Elise would make a most awesome gift.

Or a sawblade shooter. Either one.

93. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?

Oh, hell no.

94. SUMMER OR WINTER?

Depends on where I am. I dislike cold.

95. KISSES OR HUGS?

Embrace the power of “and!”

96. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE-NIGHT STANDS?

Relationships, definitely.

97. WHO IS THE MOST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?

Since I’m answering these questions right now, the likelihood that I will answer them is 100%. I can’t think of anyone whose odds of answering them is greater than 100%, so it must be…me!

98. WHO IS THE LEAST LIKELY TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?

Chairman Mao.

99. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE EXPRESSION?

If by “expression” you mean “facial expression,” the look of ecstasy on a lover’s face when she comes.

If by “expression” you mean “regular expression,” then \b[A-Z0-9._%+-]+@(?:[A-Z0-9-]+\.)+[A-Z]{2,4}\b is a pretty good one; it’s an excellent quick-and-dirty test for invalid email addresses.

If by “expression” you mean “saying,” then this one by Francis Bacon is one of my faves: Your true self can be known only by systematic experimentation, and controlled only by being known.

If by “expression” you mean “acts which reveal information without words,” then sex as an expression of love is pretty nice.

If by “expression” you mean “mathematical formulation,” then it’s a toss-up between general relativity and the polynomial equation.

If by “expression” you mean “gene expression,” then the expression of a gene coding for p53-mediated transcription, which appears to play a role in governing many of the physiological processes of aging, is a good bet.

100. IS ANYONE IN LOVE WITH YOU?

Oh, yes. And I with them, and I am privileged and honored by it.

No content was harmed during the making of this post.

54 thoughts on “Another Content-Free Post

    • I think the photo of the plant is quite lovely. The smell, probably not so much. 🙂

      My main raiding character is an alliance-side mage on Eonar. I also have a PvP warlock on Eonar. Horde-side, I have many high-level characters, most of which I don’t play often any more, including a warrior on Windrunner and a hunter on Medivh that I’ve taken out of retirement and started PvPing with. I have a few other 70s tht I never play at all, a smattering of midrange (40-60) Horde and Alliance characters on Medivh, and a few lower-level caracters on Medivh, Eonar, and Feathermoon.

      Where do you play?

  1. Chaiman Mao *always* responds when I send him quizzes.

    😛

    . . . . . You made me laugh a bunch of times, Franklin! Thanks!

    🙂

    Oh, and I am SO HAPPY for you and Z. HAPPY!!!

    Laura

    • Chairman Mao obviously likes you more than he likes me. He won’t even return my calls, the bastard.

      I need a Chairman Mao userpic, I think.

  2. Chaiman Mao *always* responds when I send him quizzes.

    😛

    . . . . . You made me laugh a bunch of times, Franklin! Thanks!

    🙂

    Oh, and I am SO HAPPY for you and Z. HAPPY!!!

    Laura

  3. In a Totally Random Coincidence, I’m sitting on the couch right now, reading LJ and waiting for some guy with a secondhand Elise to turn up so that the boy can take it for a test drive. Seriously.

      • Apparently it was great – he’d driven an S and found it a bit underpowered, but this was the first R he’d taken out and was just right. Unfortunately the guy was asking way more than the going rate and wasn’t willing to move on price.

        Still, needs to find a buyer for his current car, so no hurry. (And waiting means that someone might put a yellow or a storm grey one up for sale!)

  4. In a Totally Random Coincidence, I’m sitting on the couch right now, reading LJ and waiting for some guy with a secondhand Elise to turn up so that the boy can take it for a test drive. Seriously.

  5. You are such an odd cookie. Which is probably why I’m so fond of you. That or your damn nanobots in my brains.
    This content-free post made me giggle quite a bit.

    Now, where to find a sawblade shooter…

  6. You are such an odd cookie. Which is probably why I’m so fond of you. That or your damn nanobots in my brains.
    This content-free post made me giggle quite a bit.

    Now, where to find a sawblade shooter…

    • Oh, I do too! Or at least I did. Haven’t listened to it in ages. It doesn’t change the fact, though, that the whole lot of ’em put together scarcely has any talent to speak of.

      And speaking of no talent, I used to listen to Scorpions, too. German 80s hair metal band. Got rid of that album a long time ago.

  7. I would like Hyenas more if they didnt look so ashamed of themselves. If its personality you go for, I am not sure I understand your infatuation with them. They are sneaky thieving bastards.

  8. I would like Hyenas more if they didnt look so ashamed of themselves. If its personality you go for, I am not sure I understand your infatuation with them. They are sneaky thieving bastards.

  9. They may be sneaky thieving bastards, but they are beautiful animals, when you look at them for what they are instead of looking at them and seeing “dog.” 🙂

  10. Holy crap your meme’s are long.

    I friended you because of an answer you gave in sextips, and because I read backward and you seem interesting (<3 interesting!), and because you dislike Stranger in a Strange Land.

    If there’s any issue at all with the friending… do yell and let me know!

  11. Holy crap your meme’s are long.

    I friended you because of an answer you gave in sextips, and because I read backward and you seem interesting (<3 interesting!), and because you dislike Stranger in a Strange Land.

    If there’s any issue at all with the friending… do yell and let me know!

  12. 66. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?

    Tacit is the most common. For a long time, back in the old BBS days before these newfangled tubes came along, I was widely known as “turtle;” in fact, there’s still a handful of people who call me “turtle.”

    Yes, too true, Turtle. BTW, did I ever tell you that Scott Steele got married and has three kids now? NO?

    Huh. Must not have been important.

  13. 66. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?

    Tacit is the most common. For a long time, back in the old BBS days before these newfangled tubes came along, I was widely known as “turtle;” in fact, there’s still a handful of people who call me “turtle.”

    Yes, too true, Turtle. BTW, did I ever tell you that Scott Steele got married and has three kids now? NO?

    Huh. Must not have been important.

  14. you think I am beautiful??? you have moved me dude.. I think you are beautiful too *sticks head in warm stolen carcass, tears out rectum, places it at your feet as a love offering*

  15. I think the photo of the plant is quite lovely. The smell, probably not so much. 🙂

    My main raiding character is an alliance-side mage on Eonar. I also have a PvP warlock on Eonar. Horde-side, I have many high-level characters, most of which I don’t play often any more, including a warrior on Windrunner and a hunter on Medivh that I’ve taken out of retirement and started PvPing with. I have a few other 70s tht I never play at all, a smattering of midrange (40-60) Horde and Alliance characters on Medivh, and a few lower-level caracters on Medivh, Eonar, and Feathermoon.

    Where do you play?

  16. Chairman Mao obviously likes you more than he likes me. He won’t even return my calls, the bastard.

    I need a Chairman Mao userpic, I think.

  17. Oh, I do too! Or at least I did. Haven’t listened to it in ages. It doesn’t change the fact, though, that the whole lot of ’em put together scarcely has any talent to speak of.

    And speaking of no talent, I used to listen to Scorpions, too. German 80s hair metal band. Got rid of that album a long time ago.

    • Well, certainly they could be much worse. They could be Whitesnake, for example. 🙂 But having said that, the problem is there’s not anything particularly right with them, either.

      • y’know, each time you mention a band that should inspire shame, I have to guiltily look over at my cassette tape collection and pick that album out by memory of where in the rack it sits.

  18. Well, certainly they could be much worse. They could be Whitesnake, for example. 🙂 But having said that, the problem is there’s not anything particularly right with them, either.

  19. y’know, each time you mention a band that should inspire shame, I have to guiltily look over at my cassette tape collection and pick that album out by memory of where in the rack it sits.

  20. Apparently it was great – he’d driven an S and found it a bit underpowered, but this was the first R he’d taken out and was just right. Unfortunately the guy was asking way more than the going rate and wasn’t willing to move on price.

    Still, needs to find a buyer for his current car, so no hurry. (And waiting means that someone might put a yellow or a storm grey one up for sale!)

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